Dads: You have a Best Dad Ever coffee cup. It’s a prized possession. But the last time you were in Menards, there was a whole row of Best Dad Ever coffee cups. And that’s when you knew: There can be only one.
This Father’s Day, Surly introduces the Battle of the Dads, a competition to find the dadliest dad, the father of them all.
It’s a competition that will challenge participants in all the varieties of fatherly pursuits and responsibilities, split into four stations:
- The 9-to-5
- Keg press
- 12 oz. curls
- Diaper changing
- Beer fridge stocking
- Tee to Green
- Chipping
- Putting
- Gone Fishin’
- Kiddie pool beer can fishing
- Take Me Out to the Ballgame
- Pitcher pitching
The fifth section, haggling with the car salesman, is canceled because those guys don’t work Sundays.
There will be category winners and an overall winner. Refs will keep score, monitor gameplay, and call out any tomfoolery. Prizes will be fabulous.
Lace up those white New Balances. Call your friends from a landline phone. Fire up the minivan. May the best dad win. Let’s rock and roll.