The Surliest Winter Ever Bracket of Doom

This winter has been…challenging.

OK, it has flat-out sucked. It’s OK to admit it. If someone not from here talks smack about a Minnesota winter we will strike them down with righteous fury, but just between us, this has been brutal.

With that in mind, and with the marquee college basketball tournament crowning its champion in Minneapolis, we’ve created our own bracket for this occasion. We call it The Surliest Winter Ever Bracket of Doom. 64 entrants are vying for the not-so-shining moment of being Just The Worst.

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We have a winner.

People will be talking about this one for awhile. Cinderella #11-seed The Person Who Reminds You That You’ll Complain About Summer When It’s Hot Like He’s Goddamn Nostradamus. Shut Up, Colin coasted to an easy championship round victory over Ice Dams.

We asked him to comment on his victory, and all he said was that he doesn’t want to hear us complaining about the heat in July if we’re upset about this week’s blizzard. Classic Colin!

Thank you again to everyone who voted, to the fans from out of town for the Other Tournament who drank all our beer (looking at you, Texas Tech and Virginia), and especially the dads who bought the foam middle finger, gave it to their young children, and sent us the picture. Phenomenal dad work.